I am tired

I am so ungodly tired. We were in a rear ending accident 2 days ago and I’m stiff and my ears are still ringing. I had a baby almost two weeks ago and he, his sister and my boobs take turns waking me up all night. I still get up every morning and work out regardless of how much sleep I got. When I look in the mirror my hair is Medusa-esque and the bags under my eyes are a permanent fixture. People keep telling me and my husband that postpartum depression is a real risk. Some days I’m angry, some days I’m sad, most days I’m frustrated, but every day I’m incredibly happy and grateful. Not one day have I been so enveloped in sadness that I couldn’t breathe. I wake up every day (sometimes mildly annoyed) and know that I am so very blessed. I am blessed with so many beautiful children, with a partner that is kind and loving and helpful (most days lol), with a loving family that is dedicated to being as helpful as possible. Some days my patience is thin and I’m snappier than I mean to be, but all in all I am so very happy, even if it doesn’t seem like it. I go to bed happy, surrounded by loves and snuggles (and screaming and poop). Some people never get to experience any of this. I woke up this morning to two tiny babies snoring away in my bed; I walked out to the living room where the floor was carpeted with snuggly snoring bears; made my way upstairs to to smell of coffee left for me by my husband and I was truly grateful as I got breakfast out for the kids, bottles for the babies, and sipped my coffee. Some days are harder than others, but I am so far from depressed. I am so tired and so very very happy.